“Love does not guarantee success in marriage”
“Knowledge is the answer. A successful marriage has little to do with love. Love does not guarantee success in marriage. Love is very important for happiness in marriage, but by itself it cannot make a marriage work. The only thing that makes a marriage work is knowledge. As a matter of fact, the only thing that makes anything work is knowledge. Success depends on how much we know about something, not how we feel about it.
Most married people love and feel good about each other, but many do not know how to communicate effectively or relate well to each other. There is a huge difference between recognizing feelings and knowing how to deal with conflict. Some people define intelligence as the ability to solve complex problems. More accurately, intelligence is the ability to face reality and deal with problems while maintaining one’s sanity. Dealing with problems is not necessarily the same as solving them. Some problems can’t be solved. An intelligent person is someone who can maintain “his stability and sense of self-worth under any circumstances, evaluate the situation, deal effectively with the problem, and come out intact on the other side.
There is a great need today for intelligence and knowledge regarding marriage to offset widespread ignorance on the subject. Even the Christian Church, which should be the voice of authority on the subject of marriage, is suffering because many believers, including leaders, are biblically illiterate where marriage and the family are concerned. In this day when all the old values are being challenged left and right, both within and without the Church, many people are confused, uncertain of what to believe anymore. The root cause of this confusion is lack of knowledge.
Knowledge is critical for success and survival in anything. In Hosea 4:6a God says, “My people are destroyed from lack of knowledge.” “My people” refers to the children of God. Even Christians need knowledge. The greatest knowledge of all is to, “know God. Proverbs 1:7 says, “The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge, but fools despise wisdom and discipline” (emphasis added). It doesn’t matter how often we come to church or how often we worship the Lord; without knowledge, we have no guarantee of success.
One of the things that really bothered me as a young Christian was hearing about so many other Christians getting divorced. If followers of Christ were failing in their marriages, what hope was there for anybody else? Here were people who supposedly were filled with the Holy Spirit, who supposedly knew the Holy God, and yet they couldn’t seem to live together and get along. If that was true, we might as well forget the whole thing!
It took me a little while to learn that success in marriage depends on more than just being saved. It takes more than just being in love. Being a believer and being in love are both important in marriage, but they carry no automatic guarantee of marital, “success. We need knowledge of biblical principles; the design parameters that God Himself established. Biblical principles never change. The principles for a successful marriage and family that God gave Adam and Eve still work today. They are universally applicable in every age and in every culture. Trouble comes when we violate or ignore those principles.
Ultimately, marriage will not survive on love alone, or on feelings. By itself, just being born again is not enough to guarantee success. A successful marriage hinges on knowledge—knowing and understanding God’s principles.
vision, purpose, destiny,